Habit 4 is
the process of thinking win-win. It is about believing that everyone can make
gains, that we are all on the same team, and that we
are all equal. It is the belief that there is plenty of success to go around.
Thinking win-win can be difficult, but it always creates an abundance. To get
into this mindset, it begins with being personally secure about who we are and
what we have, and emotionally independent from others. It is nearly impossible
for us to be happy for others’ success or humble in our own when we are
insecure about ourselves.
There are two habits that make it
virtually impossible to think win-win: competing and comparing. While competing
can be healthy, pushing you to work hard and raise the bar, it can also be
detrimental to your mindset. It can become negative when self-worth becomes tied
to winning instead of being used as a benchmark to measure. Comparing, much
like competition, is damaging because it skews your self-image. There is always
someone skinnier, smarter, more self-assured, better dressed, with more money, etc.
Self-esteem based on anything other than the quality of the heart, mind and
soul is is built on a shaky foundation.
Breaking the habit of consistently comparing is hard, intentional work
but will offer more moments of joy and strong self-esteem.
Thinking win-win is contagious.
Becoming big hearted, committed to the success of others and ready to share
recognition creates a magnet for friends and positivity. This force field
changes how people think and act. It makes everyone who commit to win-win feel
happy and serene thoughts and that good feeling has an overreaching affect on
how everything else is done. It gives confidence, clarity and pleasure.
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